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Navigating Social Situations
Excerpt from a previous post in our Facebook group...
Caroline posted this question/comment that we would love to address (and we will have more to come on this topic!)
Q: I think the social aspect is really tough, particularly when others are cooking for you. My mother in law last week made a roast dinner and had remembered the gluten-free but not the sugar part.....she had bought gluten-free flour and made apple crumble for me (obviously with lots of sugar!!!) and had gone to all this effort. It was really really hard to thank her, but tell her that I wasn't going to eat the pudding!!!
The gravy/stock she used also had sugar in, so I skipped that too and she had added sugar to a red cabbage dish.
Even though I thought I'd managed it by telling her the diet part, this has made me realize it's not easy for others to remember or to think to check the backs of packets on your behalf. Even after I said I wasn't going to have the gravy/pudding because of added sugar, she passed me the mint sauce halfway through the meal and said 'you can have this, its gluten-free!!' and I had to decline and remind re sugar!
She was so kind and had gone to all this effort to try and meet my needs and I could see she was upset, but it's just not worth provoking the beast to cave into social pressure.... .so any tips on navigating this in the weeks ahead will be hugely appreciated!!!
A: YES! We have been there for sure! It is a difficult situation to be in.Here are two
options for avoiding this situation:
1) Explain the basics of the plan but tell the host that you prefer that they not make anything special for you. You can even tell them that you feel most comfortable eating meats and veggies seasoned with only salt and pepper and no sauces. Tell them that you will eat what you can and may bring some dishes to share that you also know are good for you.
2) Take over the cooking! ;) This is what we did many years back. We cook all the holiday meals now and invite others to bring any dishes that their family would miss if they didn't have.
I started with a more traditional (but gluten-free) holiday meal and each year have cut back and made fewer dishes that we won't eat. This year, as you'll see from our menu, we have cut carbs significantly. We are not even making our family's traditional cornbread dressing this year.
We'd love to hear from the rest of your what your
successful strategies have been on this topic! Share them in our Facebook group!
Another Resource on this topic:
The Chatter Issue 101 is devoted entirely to Navigating Social Challenges. Don't miss it!
And if you joined the
challenge after the Day 2 email went out, you can view that email (with the Recipe Guide) by clicking on this link.
Slay the Beast!
Josh and Jenny
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